This should help solve that Gavin & Stacey mystery, once and for all…
It’s hard to believe that the final episode of BBC’s Gavin & Stacey aired nearly seven years ago, isn't it?
Yup, it was New Year’s Day 2010 when we watched Smithy talk Nessa out of marrying Dave, and Stacey announce that she was pregnant with Gav’s baby.
And plenty of other loose ends were tied up along the way, too.
All barring ONE, that is.
Oh yes, we’re talking about Uncle Bryn and Jason’s mysterious fishing trip.
Well, it looks as if it’s up to us lot to figure it out, because there won’t be any more episodes any time soon.
Although Larry Lamb, who plays Mick Shipman, said that he'd be up for a reunion, Ruth Jones - aka Nessa and the show’s co-creator - told Radio Times, “I can promise you absolutely that there are no plans to make one…
“No, sorry folks, no more Gavin & Stacey planned!”
Damn you, Jones.
So let’s recap what we know about that fishing trip, shall we?
- They did it because they were cold
- It involves soup
- It potentially involves nudity
- It ‘defies the laws of gravity’
- It’s legal in Wales
And, for those of you who assumed that it involved a sexual liaison between the pair of the, we’re here to tell you that you’re wrong.
How do we know?
Well, Bryn and Jason are uncle and nephew - making it incest if they were to hop into bed together.
And incest is ILLEGAL in the UK, which is completely at odds with that ‘it’s legal in Wales’ comments.
SO WHAT HAPPENED, DAMN IT?
Well, the internet has plenty of theories.
One viewer wrote: “More than likely, Bryn and Jason went out fishing. Jason fell in and Bryn jumped in after him.
“After pulling him put, Bryn knew that getting warm was essential and, being Bryn, didn't think before he got them both stripped to get out of their soaking wet clothes and to cuddle to get warm.
“Upon realising, after a while, that they were two men, not to mention Uncle and Nephew, and both gay, they both have a sickening feeling of guilt about the situation.”
We like it… but it lacks any soupy substance, doesn’t it?
Another suggested: “They fell in the water, and ate warm soup by a fire in a bid to get warm.
“When that isn’t work, they ditched their clothes (to increase body heat) and clambered into a tree / hammock to sleep.
“I assume spooning was involved and perhaps someone woke up with morning glory wood and they decided to try keep it secret for the sake of their reputations.”
And one VERY loyal fan penned a whole piece of fan fiction about that fishing trip - with a slightly different twist.
It suggested that the duo had been intent on camping out during their fishing trip, but it soon became too cold to remain in their tents.
Instead, they checked into a hotel - and the proprietor, worried about their exposure to the rain and winds, made up a special vat of leek and potato soup for the pair to enjoy in their rooms.
While Jason was in the bathroom, Bryn made use of the television set in their room to find an “adult programme” (aka gay porn) that would keep them entertained throughout the night.
He settled back in the bed to watch the admittedly frisky show, resting the mug of soup on his stomach to keep himself warm.
However, when Jason came in, Bryn jumped, spilling the soup all over his trousers - and even causing some to splash upwards onto the ceiling.
With the adult programme still playing in the background, things obviously looked a little confusing to Jason - and the entire situation remained VERY awkward between the pair of them forever more.
We quite like this theory (you can read the whole thing here]) because it checks off a lot of the crucial points.
There’s soup, there’s gravity-defying antics (it hit the ceiling!), there’s a healthy dose of awkwardness, and it remains legal in this country.
Then again, we doubt we’ll ever know what really happened.
After all, both James Corden and Ruth Jones have admitted they didn’t have an actual event in mind when they wrote it into the script; they wanted it to remain a mystery for viewers forever.
Mission achieved, guys!
What do YOU think happened on that fishing trip, Gavin & Stacey fans? Let us know your thoughts via Facebook or Twitter (@CloserOnline) now.