Should parents have access to their children’s mobile phones?

It's a question many parents constantly ask themselves

Mum and daughter on phone

by Eden-Olivia Lord |
Published on

A concerned mother has sparked a debate on Mumsnet after asking the fellow parents, "Should I have access to my nearly 12 year old dd's phone?"

The woman, who goes by the username Brontebiscuits, wrote: "So far I have always known her password but now she's changed it. I check her messages etc every so often. She knows this and has changed the password more than once.

"She is sensible and I don't think she would do anything daft online and I've spoken to her about messages from people she doesn't know (she says she just blocks them instantly). Should I just leave her to it and let her have privacy?"

Mumsnet users were quick to unanimously respond saying yes, she should have full access to her 12-year-old daughters phone.

One person wrote: "No. No article on grooming etc ever starts 'I let my child have sole access to her/his phone even though I knew they were not sensible.' Your daughter is probably very sensible but it only takes one predator playing a long game that's when problems can start. Or a friend no longer becoming a friend and sending hurtful stuff."

Teenage girl on phone
What age do you think parents should stop looking at their children's phones? (Credit: Getty Images) ©Getty Images

Another commented: "I have passwords to both my daughters' phones – they are 14 and 12. They are sensible kids but it's my responsibility to keep them safe and there are many pitfalls out there – I'm more talking about bullying etc than getting involved with weirdos.

"I've told them that I play for the phones and while that is the case they must allow access. When they pay for their own they don't need to give me access anymore… As they get older I'll tail off the looking."

Teenage girl on phone
Some parents thought it was concerning that the nearly 12 year old kept changing her password (Getty Images) ©Getty Images

Someone else argued: "Yes you need to see it regularly. If she changes the password you take the phone away. The fact that she is keeping you from seeing it is a worry."

Another parent explained: "You need to protect her online in the same wa you'd protect her in real life. Would you leave her alone in a place where it is known that there are people who will target young girls? Would you leave her alone with bullies?"

You can read he full conversation on Mumsnet here.

What do you think? Do you have access to your children's phones? How do they feel about it? Let us know over on Facebook and Twitter.

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