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All The Most Batsh*t Bikinis At Miami Swimwear Week

Oh yes, of course, we'd accessorise that teeny tiny piece of material with a gold medallion belt weighing three stone

Just when you thought it was safe to go to the beach, Florida’s swimwear fashion week happens. Yes, that's a whole week of fashion shows dedicated to teeny weeny swimming costumes. You can just imagine how much fake-tan went into the production of this event.

Considering there is only so much one can do to make a bikini interesting, the designers at Funkshion Swim Week Miami have taken lessons from Victoria’s Secret’s catwalk. To make a splash, they've booked models with sculpted bodies and dressed them outrageously. It's like a cruel game. This season they made a splash by rising the hemlines and going overboard with the accessories. Velvet, corseting and crystals are now considered legitimate poolside options and make-up of the most extrovert kind has been given the go-ahead. So, next time you’re packing for a vacation, why not consider these new trends, hot off Miami’s catwalks…

Disco Inferno

Beware of sinking in this glitzy, encrusted trend favoured by designers Elie Madi, Holidolls and Rocky Gathercole.

The Grass Is Always Greener

Feathered belts, leaf hair ties and palm leave bikini tops featured on Coco Blaq, Mister Triple X and Du Acqua’s catwalks.

Beach Body Ready

Generally speaking, McDonald’s and models rarely have much to do with one another. But, like a cosmic matchmaker, Miami Swim Week introduced us to McDCouture, a limited edition line of cossies created out of Maccy D’s packaging.

Millennial Pink’s Lifeline

Lolli Swim and Lliana Montoya kindly threw a life jacket to the sinking millennial pink trend with its line of velour siren swimwear. Yes, she is wearing shells.

The Ultimate Add-On

A spotlight was put on accessories of all kinds, sizes and insanity by Minimale Animale and Baes and Bikinis.

Freeing The Nipple

When club wear meets swim club.

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READ MORE: Is Red The New Millennial Pink?

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