Wedding Gift Giving: The New Etiquette
In our modern and internet savvy age, the giving and receiving of wedding gifts is no longer a cut and dried affair. There’s a delicate line to tread between making life easy for your older and more conservative guests/relatives VS not appearing grabby/ prescriptive/ old-fashioned to your easy-going uni friends, thus the subject can cause quite the dilemma for the bride and groom to be. To gift-list or not to gift-list (or secret gift-list!?). That is the question.
We’ve turned to party planners supreme Knot & Pop for their cut-to-the-chase guide to wedding gifting:
1. Your presence is present enough.
You might decide that you have enough pots and pans, and that your guests being there to celebrate with you is gift enough. In which case, simply include this sentiment with your invite. However, do remember to provide a designated table/ box or corner within the venue for those who wish to leave you a card.
2. Alternative gift list.
It is worth bearing in mind that there will be friends and family who DO what to give you a little gift of their love and congratulations. If you would like to make sure that their money is not wasted on things you do not want, it might be worth considering setting up an alternative gift list.
There are some incredible online lifestyle stores that now offer a gift list service, these range from art, rugs, decorative bits and bobs to collectable pieces of furniture. One of our favourites is Rockett St George. Just ensure you have a nice range of price points for your guests to choose from.
Another recommendationis to create a gift list that you only give to guests who ask... that way you can please both camps.
3. Sausage and Mash (cash).
Asking for money straight up can feel a bit strange and some of our brides and grooms have asked if it’s ok to take this route. We say yes if done in the right way. It’s always a good idea to give your guests an idea of what you will use their generous gift for and include details of your wedding gift list account with the invite.
There are lots of fun ways to word this given some imagination. Penned by one of our grooms, our current favourite is: “We love the weird and wonderful (hence your invite) so we’ve decide to do/buy X and would love any contribution to this that you might like to make.”
This is another great option if you feel some of your guests would want to bestow a gift on you. Request that your guests make an online contribution to your favourite charity or perhaps there is an overseas foundation you’d like to support and visit whilst on honeymoon?
If you’ve long held a desire to run a marathon, do a charity climb or complete a challenge, this is the perfect time to ask friends and family for their financial support to help you reach your target donation.
5. Let’s get together, right now
Many people go through life with an ambition to learn or do something different. This is just the time to think about making that a reality with the help of your loved ones. Learn a language together, hone the art of printmaking or become members at a couple of your favourite galleries – happy marriages are built on shared experiences and this is the perfect way of making sure that as the time ticks by, you still have time for each other.
6. That Sweet Trip
A contribution to a honeymoon, or even a post-wedding mini break is always a great option and can be facilitated by contributions into a honeymoon bank account or via a service such as Zankyou or Patchwork Present. Most of the specialist travel companies will also offer this option for honeymooners. This allows you to have the trip of your dreams and for your nearest and dearest to contribute to something you REALLY want.
And - of course - don’t forget the thank you cards!