Geordie Shore: Scotty T does the MEANEST thing to Chloe Ferry

THERE ARE SO MANY SPOILERS IN HERE THAT GEORDIE SHORE WILL TOTALLY BE SPOILED FOR YOU IF YOU READ THIS. You have been warned.

Tonight in Geordie Shore, Scotty T is set to do the worst thing to Chloe Ferry that a boy can do to a girl.

Other than give her some kind of disease.

Or jilt her at the altar.

Or take her last chicken nugget.

OK, OK, but what he does is still pretty RANK.

He gets off with Chantelle Connelly in front of her.

That’s right. Despite Chloe putting Scotty’s actual penis in her mouth last week. Because apparently that meant nothing to Scotty. Again.

And - hang on - Scotty said that he didn’t like Chantelle that much either. So what is he actually playing at?

Could he just be trying to pit the women against each other?

Dangerous move, Scotty, Dangerous move.

Although, it does seem to be working. The tentative friendship between Chloe and Chantelle crumbles to dust in tonight’s episode when Chantelle finds out that Chloe kissed Scotty on his penis.

“Sorry pet. Your slaggy little plan to keep him away from us by sucking his cock didn’t work. Gutted for you. Jog on,” Chantelle says, charmingly, before making up with Scott but not Chloe.

Question: why are two beautiful, intelligent (yes) ladies fighting over the self-proclaimed turbo dick? It’s not like he has a Gary Beadle-style parsnip, so far as we’re aware.

And it’s not just Chloe who falls out with Chantelle: Marnie Simpson sticks her oar in too, leading to a MEGA FIGHT with Holly Hagan.

But Chantelle gets the last laugh, so far as she’s concerned anyway, as she finishes the night straddling Scotty and then heading for his bed.

Blimey.

Geordie Shore continues on Tuesdays at 10pm on MTV.

Now feast your eyes on the best of the cast’s naked snaps.