Top tip: Don't call him Michael
This year's Love Island has been absolutely the TV highlight of the year and pretty much all we can talk about at the heat office. We're currently in about 4425235 different Love Island-related Whatsapp groups and have cancelled all social plans until 24 July (the sad, sad day this series is over).
As well as providing the usual helping of raunchiness, coupling-up drama and a side-order of heartbreak, this year's show has also seen more shocking twists than that rusty old helter-skelter at your local summer fete.
Honestly, the producers must be working out some serious relationship issues with all the curve-balls their throwing into the villa.
One of which was the return of previous Islanders Sam Gowland and Mike Thalassitis.
Yep. Muggy Mike is back in the villa to (probably) break more hearts, steal someone else's girl and woo us with those mesmorising eyes.
So here's EVEYTHING you need to know about the human with potentialy the most difficult surname to spell after Cara Delevingne. Why you gotta make our lives so hard, Mike? WHY?
Who is Love Island's Mike Thalassitis?
Mike's a semi-pro footballer, don'tchaknow?
Where is Mike Thalassitis from?
How old is Mike?
What is Mike Thalassitis's Instagram?
You can follow him over at @mike_thala. Expect pensive looks and much in the way of pouting.
What's Mike's USP?
He says: "I just think I look different to all of them. Tall, dark and handsome – which is what most of the girls have said they are looking for."
What's Mike's idea of a nightmare date?
Mike says: "Just dates that are filled with complete boredom. When you sit there thinking ‘this is going no where.’
"When you don’t click and when they don’t laugh at my jokes. I think I’m quite funny."
Has Mike been on TV before?
Nope. Before Love Island, he explained: "I’ve never done any TV before, but with the football I’ve played professionally and l’ve played for my country. I was in the newspapers in Cyprus when I scored a winner in a game."
How would Mike's exes describe him?
He says: "They’d probably say I was honest. They’ll likely be shocked to see me on this."
Who's Mike coupled up with in the Love Island villa?
After admitting his type, saying: "Looks wise, I’d say Jessica, Olivia and Amber. But personality is really important – I couldn’t be with Jessica if we were having boring conversation. I want to have a laugh and enjoy the girl’s company."
In his first forray into the villa Mike took Tyne-Lexy, Jess and Montana on a date. He also had his eye on Olivia and caused her to split with Chris Hughes.
What happened between Mike and Jess? Did they have sex?
After being dumped from the Island alongside Dom's partner Jess, rumours began to fly around that Jess and Mike had slept together. It was (still is) pretty much anyone could talk about. Read the latest here.
Where did the nickname Muggy Mike come from?
In the villa, Chris and Mike didn't exactly see eye-to-eye. They were both on a mission to win over Olivia, and at first it looked as though Mike and managed it. But Liv soon had a change of heart and things were back on with her and Chris.
During a re-coupling, Chris took the opportunity to give a heartfelt speech about his feelings for Liv and dubbed the newcomer 'Muggy Mik'. It's stuck.
Wait, hold up. Mike is BACK in the Love Island villa?
In possibly one of the best moves from the producers to date, viewers hda to decide whether to send in two new boys or let two former Ilsanders back into the villa.
The British public, of course, made the right decision and Mike and Sam stormed back into the villa.
Will Mike try his luck with Olivia again now that her and Chris appear to be over?
Or will he crack on with newly single Tyla? Maybe even new girl Georgia?
WE. CANNOT. WAIT. TO. FIND. OUT.