CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR TONIGHT'S SHOW
Life in the Celebrity Big Brother house is, we imagine, a little bit boring.
If the housemates aren't competing in a task like the Christmas challenge that was one of our TV highlights of the year (other than Ricky Norwood's strop – come on Ricky, play the game, it's quite literally what you're there for) what is there to do?
Other than fight, smooch and put on make-up for 90 minutes (we're looking at you, Aubrey O'Day).
So perhaps it's no surprise that Marnie Simpson decided that the time was ripe to perform a sex act on a banana.
And by sex act we mean FULL ORAL.
In a clip shown on CBBOTS, Marnie was seen going down on the phallic fruit after asking Katie Waissel to demonstrate her technique.
Renee Graziano told Marnie that it looked "excellent" and Aubrey offered her some tips for improvement. Sweet.
There sure has been a lot of talk about giving head on this series of CBB. Renee's previously claimed it was good for tightening the jaw line that we are taking with a large pinch of salt, frankly.
And Aubrey told Big Brother that what she really wanted for Christmas was "dick".
We want a pony but we are terribly old-fashioned.
Talking of dick, Lewis Bloor was evicted from the *CBB *house on Friday. Were you shocked? We were quite shocked. Mind you, in the run-up to each of his potential / actual eviction he showed the viewing public his ENORMOUS and hairless peenand then his actual testicles.
Where else was there for him to go? Other than internal.
*Celebrity Big Brother continues tonight at 9pm on Channel 5 when the nomination results will be revealed. Exciting times. *